Walled In, Broken Out

Position.

I am multiracial.

I am multilingual.

I am lost, uncertain,

Stuck among different cultures.

Social media has me walled in

With economic crises in the front, political showdowns in the back,

And religious extremists on either side.

But then, my world is released from rest

With velocity.

My Facebook feed is swarmed with news

Of diplomatic fallouts

Of religious tensions

Of political drama.

I feel unsure

Of how to form an opinion,

Of how to navigate through this speeding landscape.

The swarm picks up speed

With acceleration.

Arguments spin

Faster and faster.

Every moment I am slapped

With more bickering and squabbling.

My heritages are at each other’s throats

Fighting desperately to win me over

Spiraling me out of control

With a jerk.

Peace in the Middle East? Hot air.

Trans-Pacific Partnership? Bologna.

One China? Deflated.

Democracy? Defenestrated.

How am I supposed to feel?

What am I to stand up for?

Snap!

My thoughts splinter.

Mom says Israel’s settlements violate Palestinian human rights

Dad says Israel is the paragon of virtue.

Grandpa is a Chinese nationalist firebrand

Grandma wants socialist healthcare.

I don’t know what to believe.

I feel that I have lost my motivation, my worth,

And it seems like

My life.

Crackle!

The heat of debate breaks two-twelve.

My world melts and combusts

Yet I feel a small tap of debris on my shoulder.

It is the tap of my heritages and cultures.

For once I may feel that I belong,

And I grapple with the power of my independent thought.

I begin to regain my will, my purpose,

And it seems like

My mind.

Pop!

My internal magnetic fields realign.

I realize I can use my multiracial background to my advantage

And speak for myself without regard to what Mom or Dad thinks.

I have regained my vision, my drive,

And it seems like

Myself.